METER MAID
I'm comin' to ruin your day
I'm a bad ol' ugly meter maid
Just go and ask my man Jerome
He says I'm mean workin' but I'm meaner at home
Here comes a man without no change
Well I'll wait right here 'till he's out of range
Before he comes back to pay
Well I'll give him a ticket an' I'll tow him away
Gimme your money, let's cut a deal
Or I'll stick my boot on your left front wheel
Caught my man runnin' round like a mutt
You know he needs a boot on his you know what
I know your name
Got your number
You treat me nice
Or pay the price
My man's workin hard all day
Put your money in the meter if you wanna' stay
Put food on the table and bring home the bread
If you wanna park it in my bed
If you wanna ruin your life
Take a bad ol' meter maid for your wife
Just go and ask my man Jerome
He says I'm mean workin' but I'm meaner at home
I HATE YOU
Spoken-
Sweetheart, you know it's been awhile -
Something that's been on my mind that I really needed to express to you....
I must tell you how I really feel....
Man-
Oh you are an angel
An angel sent from hell
Your mouth like a sailor
Your cheap cosmetic smell
Woman-
Darling you are a loser
It's you I love to kill
Both-
Darling you ruined my life
So I hate you and I always will
Man-
From your implants that failed
To the milkman that you nailed
It's been you, it's been you
That's tried to make me lose my mind
Woman-
Well, you come on so tough
And then you can't get it up
And if you do
Then it's still hard to find
Man-
You cheap little ho'
Slippin' out the back door
You go out with any man
For a nickel or a dime
Woman-
You no workin bum
You never made me come
Yeah, I faked it
Each and every time
Oh you are a big fat couch-sittin' sport-watchin' alky
Corona's by the keg
Man-
Oh darlin I'll stop my drinking
If you'll only shave your legs
Woman-
It's too bad your mama wasn't on the pill
Man-
Leave my mother outa this
Both-
Darling you ruined my life
So I hate you and I always will
Darling you ruined my life
So I hate you and I always will
GITTAR SCHOOL
Lost my job at McDonald's
Kept droppin' burgers on the floor
Everybody knows I ain't nothin' but a fool
So mama won't ya send me to gittar school
Got the money, so I'm in the door
Bought me a shiny 'lectric gittar
Baddest gittar in the store
Came with a wire an' a funny little pin
And the school is gonna teach me to plug it in
Got the money with the highest score
Takin' the bus to Hollywood
Gonna be so fine
Big swimmin' pools and movie stars
Gonna have a real good time
A real good time
Got no more time fo' lessons
Learned some chords an' got a tan
Now I'm gone up to Seattle way
Gonna play my chords in a big grunge band
XANAX
Should I let my mind explode
Should I fall on my knees and pray
I can't take this don't you know
But I think I found a way
Gimme one or two
Pink or white medication
Gimme one or two or just five
Gimme eight or nine
Artificial relaxation
C'mon gimme one or two to stay alive
Every midnite is my noon
Now's the time when I'll get my kicks
Cause the time is comin' soon
When I'll need another fix
YOU GET OFF ON ME
Talk dirty but I won't listen - won't take your call
Do I know you honey - got my number off the wall
I ain't in business baby - why don't you call 9...0...0
You can ask me sweet - but the answer's no no no
Oh yeah, I know you - I know your name
You said you'd call me - so that's how you play the game
This ain't no social call - why call me at 2...A...M
Yeah I'm in bed baby - and the bedroom light is dim
You get off on me
It's an audio world honey - come hear my show
Am I wearing this or that - well I bet you'd like to know
Yeah I'm bored an' lonely - you know I need some... thin'... new
Let's do it but remember - it's for me not just for you
MOCHA
Mocha Mocha Mocha
Why'd ya got to leave me this way
Mocha Mocha Mocha
Why'd ya got to leave me this way
You livin' in the fast lane
That's a price - a price you have to pay
You lookin' real mean
But oh how you love to play
You lookin' real mean
But oh how you love to play
But you know all dogs go to heaven
Gonna see you again someday
SAME AS YOU
Feed me once in the morning
Feed me once at night
Don't turn me loose in the daytime
'Cause you know I'll eat everything in sight
Well I don't want to ride for nothin'
What do you want me to do
But when I do what I should
Just tell me that I'm doin' good
'Cause baby I'm the same as you
Got a bad libido
Always in the mood
Just get me all excited
I'll jump on anything that moves
Now there's no doubt in my mind where I'm goin'
I've got my instincts to guide my way
I've got no time to see
If there's a future for me
I'll just keeping goin' on my way
Say I'm always friendly
Got no reason to be mad
Just stay away from my yard, boy
'Cause you don't want to see me when I'm mad